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Funniest Mitch Hedberg Jokes (by 3 users)
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Mitch Hedberg was the king of one-liners. What are your favorite Mitch Hedberg jokes? If you're a big Mitch fan, help decide what were the best Mitch jokes.
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I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait.
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This shirt is "dry-clean only," which means it's dirty.
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I like an escalator, man, 'cause an escalator can never break. It can only become stairs.
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I like rice. Rice is great when you're hungry and you want 2,000 of something.
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I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
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I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it.
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I don't have a girlfriend. I just know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.
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I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
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"I like an escalator, man, 'cause an escalator can never break. It can only become stairs."
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Because of acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine. I saw through the bullshit.
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